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Steward Denethor II [entries|friends|calendar]
lordofthecity

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What makes you jealous and how do you deal with it? [26 Jul 2004|12:27pm]
Thorongil was welcomed to Minas Tirith as if one of the Valar had descended to the world of mortal men. A natural leader whose quiet countenance belied his inner strength, he was loved and admired by Gondor’s men and women alike.

I should have admired him too. He could have been a role model to me, and a friend. I would gladly have looked to him, if only my father had not him given the attention due me.

The night we both stood before Echthelion and he chose Thorongil to lead the advance on Umbar was the first time I recognized my feelings as jealousy. Those feelings had grown steadily as my father turned more and more to this usurper for council. I tried my best to ignore it, but as my father hugged this other man to his breast and called him “my son”, my emotions rebelled.

How do I deal with jealousy? By turning it to my advantage, as I attempt to do with every situation that is handed to me. Displays of emotion are unacceptable for the son of the steward. I swallowed the urge to ask my father why I was second best, why his own flesh and blood was not good enough to be entrusted with the safety of the City. Instead, I garnered all my strength and turned my mind towards outdoing Thorongil. Perhaps my father would never notice my attempts to best my rival, but as I studied, strategized, and learned to master the seeing stones, I knew inside that I would make a better ruler of the White City.

Muse: Denethor
Fandom: LotR
Words: 267
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How do you view commitment? [04 Jul 2004|11:35pm]
This is an intriguing question, for it seems to require me to define the word when I am more drawn to think about the commitments in my life. However, for the sake of this exercise, I proffer that a commitment is a promise, a pledge, that is given to another.

And now to get to the heart of the question. Undoubtedly, the greatest commitment of my life was assuming the stewardship. This commitment has taken precedence over my own interests, indeed, over the very health and happiness of those dearest to my heart. I regret that this has been so, sorely at times, but the office is a promise that I take very seriously. I pledged to hold Gondor for the return of the king until the day of my death. And I will do so.

Muse: Denethor
Fandom: LotR
Words: 136
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What's a typical day for you? [13 Jun 2004|11:01am]
I consider a typical day one in which I am not forced to deal with the exigences of war. Granted, those are becoming rarer as the threats of Mordor encroach on our lands. Still, I welcome the typical days that start at dawn when the palace servants draw back the drapes and bring me my breakfast. I spend the morning with my councillors, guards and spies. I hear war briefs and sign tedious documents, before enjoying a light luncheon with my chief councillor while trying to make sense of what we've heard.

In the afternoon I might take a walk in the garden or perhaps engage in some sword practice to keep my aging bones in shape. Afterwards, I spend a few hours reading in the library before the evening meal. If my sons are in the City we dine together, and I invariably manage to upset them through one of my comments, even those as innocent as inquiring about happenings in Ithilien.

*sighs*

After dinner, I read before going to bed - perhaps some history, perhaps something that tells me of how people live in faraway places. I have always longed to travel, but my duties have kept me close to home. The best tales of Far Harad and even further afield come through their emissaries, but when these are not available I turn to my books.

Sometimes, if my mind refuses to still, I wander back into my study and slip into the hidden camera where waits a glassy eye. And I look into it, and I see things that perhaps I should not see, but that my curiosity cannot resist.

And then I fall into a troubled sleep.

Muse: Denethor II
Fandom: LotR
Word count: 281
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The perfect evening? [26 May 2004|01:42pm]
A night unscarred by enemy attacks, spent dining peacefully with my sons, would be a perfect evening. You are surprised that I include both my sons in this? Yes, I too have heard some claim that I bear no love for my youngest son. To them I would ask how a father cannot love his son. Nay, my feelings for Faramir are strong, every bit as strong as that for his brother. Perhaps stronger, for in my youngest I see glimpses of myself, complete with all the untapped potential and the shortcomings that I have fought so hard to overcome. If I show my love in different ways, it is because my sons are very different men. And if I am severe in my judgment of Faramir, it is only because I hope that he will learn from my example – that he will know that sympathy is hard won in times of war and that weakness is rewarded with death.

But my mind wanders from the question at hand, as it so often does in these dark days. To dine with my sons, to have them safe by my hearth, to not fear for their future – that would be a near perfect evening, marred only by the absence of she whom we all love.

Muse: Denethor
Fandom: LotR
Words: 214
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Who is your role model? [16 May 2004|09:21pm]
Mardil, the first ruling steward, has always been my role model. When I fear what might befall us here on the edge of Mordor I consider what it must have been like for Mardil to watch day after day for his king. At what point did he realise there would be no joyful homecoming? Was he overcome with grief? Did he wonder whether the steward would be accepted in the king’s stead? Did he wonder whether his hands, trained as a councillor, would be able to take the reins of Gondor?

Regardless of his own fears and doubts, Mardil vowed to rule until the king returned. His resolve prevented Gondor from disintegrating into civil war and issued in many years of peace. Almost a thousand years later I am bound by that same oath. As our own times grow ever darker, and the future of Gondor looks ever bleaker, I turn often to the example of Mardil Voronwë, the Steadfast.

Muse: Denethor
Fandom: LotR
Words: 160
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What would your life be, if it were a movie? Comedy, horror, drama, sci-fi? And who would play you? [01 May 2004|05:20pm]
Surely it would be horror. Always Gondor was plagued by Mordor and the darkness of Sauron, but never so much as now. Any movie made of these times would be rife with gruesome fell beasts, graphic battle sequences, and the fear felt by all men in these dread times.

But a greater horror haunts me as I sit upon this cold stone chair, going through the motion of ruling the City when I know my work is in vain. What is horror if not the knowledge that the title held through 26 generations will end with you? What is it if not knowing that the sons you raised are either too bold or too weak to rule after you? What is more horrific than watching the only one you ever loved fade inexorably before your eyes, and you can do nothing to stop it?

Desperation born of despair. That is true horror.

As for who would portray me in this movie, I liked Robert Duvall in The Great Santini. He was a good father.

Muse: Denethor
Fandom: LotR
Words: 174
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